Love always: Celebrating my son during Autism Acceptance Month
Loving my son was never the hard part. The challenge is figuring out how to parent a child with autism to keep him safe and build independence. Here’s what we’ve learned together.
Editor’s note: Keli Ferguson is a communications manager at Verizon and a parent of a child with autism. For Autism Acceptance Month, she’s sharing how those two worlds overlap. Verizon supports organizations like the Autism Society of America, and this is her story of how that connection shows up in real life.
My vibrant, funny third grader was diagnosed with autism at the age of four. Looking back, it wasn’t a shock. I had always known my son was unique, a little different from his peers. But that didn’t make the diagnosis any easier.
For me, Autism Acceptance Month is personal. The reality of autism means accepting certain limitations, a realization that can be tough for any parent.
What changes for parents after an autism diagnosis
An autism diagnosis shifted a lot of my expectations. Not because my child’s potential disappeared, but because his future looked different than what I thought it would.
Initially, I had a brief, perhaps selfish, period of grieving. But not in the way you might think. I didn’t have any preconceived notions of what it meant to have a son. Would he be a collegiate athlete like his dad and uncle? Or perhaps he would report on athletes, like his mom? No, my grief was more global. I grieved the belief that the world was his oyster and he could be anything he wanted to be.
My son is on the milder end of the spectrum, needing less support than many others, but less support doesn’t mean no support.
Keli Ferguson and her son
What daily life is like raising a child with autism
After attending behavioral therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy mixed with a homeschool co-op type educational environment for four years, and then special education in public school for one year, my son now attends a mix of general education and special education classes. While he certainly still has his challenges, his prior education experiences and therapies laid an amazing foundation for plenty of triumphs in navigating the social complexities of third grade.
He is super smart, especially when it comes to the solar system. He’s also a talented drummer, and boy, is he funny! He even earned the award for camp comedian at summer camp last year.
Like many children on the autism spectrum, he has communication challenges that aren’t related to intelligence. He can struggle to understand language and articulate his thoughts clearly. Instead, his ideas arrive in a vivid mosaic of words. Brilliant on their own, but left for me to piece together into a picture that makes sense. Social situations are also a significant challenge. I see his desire to connect, but I also see his confusion about how to initiate that connection. His classmates adore him, but the social landscape can still feel like a foreign country to him.
Why safety and separation are major concerns for parents of autistic children
If we get separated, my son may struggle to ask for help, explain his situation or respond to questions from people who don’t know him. This is where my fear of separation creeps in.
The thought of losing him in a crowded place is a recurring nightmare. It has happened twice. (I found him within minutes both times, thankfully.) While he knows my name and number, I worry he wouldn’t know the essential steps —finding an employee, asking for help and explicitly saying, “I’m lost. Can you help me find my mommy?”
Because of this constant, nagging anxiety, I find myself holding his hand a little tighter in large crowds and scanning my surroundings with hypervigilance. The fear of getting separated is a real and present shadow.
Tools and strategies that can help keep children with autism safe
Safety is about more than awareness. It’s about having tools that can help fill the gaps when communication breaks down.
That’s why products like Verizon Family Plus and the Gizmo Watch - 3 Adventure resonate so deeply with me. Their location services and communication features offer reassurance.
While I understand that technology isn’t a cure-all, it can be a vital tool in offering a sense of security and fostering a degree of independence.
Autism Acceptance Month isn’t just about celebrating differences. It’s about acknowledging the unique challenges faced by individuals on the spectrum and ensuring they have the support they need to thrive. It’s about recognizing that every autistic individual is different, with varying strengths and needs.
My son is a testament to this individuality. He’s a brilliant, humorous young man who navigates the world in his own unique way. While we may face challenges, our journey is filled with love, laughter and the constant pursuit of understanding.
We’ve got you: You’re there for them with Verizon Family. Verizon’s there for you — including our 3-year price lock*.
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